The Chicken Hero Saga Chapter Six: The rise of Deboner

There is a story of love here
If you read between the lines
We aren't meant to understand
The situation as defined
 

  It was a rare slow day at the harvest, so the Hero did what most heroes do in those occasions, he sat around and and talked about himself.  After many a tale about his adventures, young Petrus the third asked of the Deboner, and after the usual round of giggling there was silence.  Petrus asked how he could defeat the Deboner, or if he even knew where he was.  The Hero looked grim, yet thoughtful, he didn't have an answer just yet, but with the new found power of montage given to him by foul foe turned foul friend Cluckus he would have the Intel he sought out.  His co-workers were shocked and confused, yet filled with rhythmic exuberance as the strains of Never Gonna Give you up played, and they watched him quickly look over maps and assorted data sheets. Returning to his seat he looked at young Petrus and said "I have discovered that he has a fortress at Mount Cialis, but it is not at the very top, it is in some deep deep cavern and can only be found by hitting some kind of button, the map says I am looking for a spot marked with a G.  "But can you find it?" asked the inquisitive cook, "According to legend few men have, but I plan to try my darnedest." "But what will you do if you can't find your way in?" "Well I may not be able to reach the bottom, but I will certainly beat the sides out of it to reach him."


..........Meanwhile at Mount Cialis...................

 "LOOK AT THOSE FOOLS, THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT'S COMING" he screamed to......absolutely nobody, he was so focused on watching through his big periscope, which extended for miles, so he could see the vast plains, he called it his one eyed monster, and never quite understood why the men laughed and the women were repulsed when he labeled it that. He had never even heard them leave, he had been clutching the one eyed monster so long that he lost track of time, they were lazy, those minions, and they never understood him, no one understood him, his mind began to wonder, he hated when it wondered.


.......Paris France, sometime between the French surrendered for the first and second time....................

 Peter Debonyay was a happy child, despite not knowing his father, only hearing stories about how he was a Mexican colonel in the revolution, who had left to open his own chain of chicken restaurants.  The man never sent money but often sent boxes of chickens, and while he thought there were too many herbs and spices, he liked the chicken nonetheless. He was a simple child, content to sit and play with his balls, and balls of others, yes many soccer games were had in his village. He could see his mother was weary from supporting him on her own, and was frustrated from the lack of support from his father, but as a proud French person she had taught him that there was no shame in surrendering, and "Why fight? when they will just run us over anyway."  This was the attitude he had had until that fateful night as a teen, while sat at the table eating more of his father's chicken, how he hated that chicken now, his mother began to choke on a bone, until then he had only seen choking from his national soccer team, he had not seen it in person, and he did not know what to do, he watched as his mother gagged on that fateful bone and lay motionless.

  The anger grew after her death, the ball of rage became bigger and bigger with nothing to focus it on.  Life had given him the shaft, and he would give the shaft back, and he would make it hurt.  As he cleared out his house, and prepared to leave there, possibly to never return, he saw it, the box of discarded chicken bones, the thing that had killed his mother, and then he knew, it was the chicken, all the chickens had to die.  He would lay all his might upon the white, on a lark he would destroy the dark, he knew he was angry because he only rhymed when he was angry, he would crush the bones of every foul, it could get messy, he packed a towel.  He set out on his mission, no more a Debonyay, now a Deboner.



..........Back to the Future(excellent movie, check it out)

There is a story of hate here
One of deceit and lies
Now we strike out at the world
To sully it in our eyes
 

 His daydreaming was interrupted by his large henchmen Mr. Black, he spared no expense to find the best henchmen, and he knew it was true what they said, once you got Black, you don't come back. "Sir, the weapon is just about ready to go." Ah yes the weapon, it was his baby, the thing that would help him to achieve his goal, standing ten feet tall, longer then it was wide, he approached it and stood in awe, all the girl minions wouldn't stop touching it until he chased them away.  With the press of a button it sent a pulse that honed into the brains of chickens, causing them to actually fly, fly in the direction of of the device, he called it the chick magnet, for nothing could resist it's power.  He tapped his massive rod staff on the ground to get the attention of his minions. "Ladies and gentleman.....war is coming........the Hero thinks he can stop me but he will be defeated, his bones crushed like the bones of the rotting foul he tries to protect.  For too long I have been screwed, but no more, I will not be the screwer  not the screwee and I will be on top. When the time is right I will enter the harvest, and I will thrust evil all upon it, and they will scream, but I will not stop until every last one of them is crushed.  The Hero likes to sit there and make his jokes at me and the expense of others, well when he sees what is about to be delivered to him, he will laugh no more HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA......yeah that, no more of that.

.............Meanwhile back at the Harvest............

 "And that's how I discovered how good chocolate and peanut butter tastes together" said the Hero still telling his epic tales, he knew his co-workers were not asleep, they were just deep in focus and admiration.  His stories were stopped with the appearance of a cloaked messenger, his face hidden, he rode in on horseback and threw a package at the hero.  The hero opened it and dropped it just as quickly, contained inside was a powder, inherently he knew what the powder was, it was ground up chicken bones, picking up the paper there was nothing else but these words, and with them he knew war was coming:

                                                       I feel this situation
                                                      On the winds of change
                                                Remember me when your dreaming
                                                     Ive gone boneless