Well overall life is pretty boring these days, I get up, I go to work, I come home, rather, rinse, repeat. Well Thursday was pretty good, morning started off the way mornings should, by running around in the woods shooting people with paint. Paintball is a great sport, it was created for people with a lack of compassion, mercy, and remorselessness such as myself. It got off to a rocky start, as we had a sudden spurt of snow and our balls started to freeze(teeheheheee) which jammed up the guns of some of the guys. As paintball came and went, and plans for more paintball arose, I went back to the mediocrity that is my life, and I decided to see what was going on in the rest of the world. As usual the world continues to be filled with crazy events, and without further ado lets look at some of things going on that are news to me.
It appears that a volcano in Iceland has turned Great Britain and other parts of Europe into the equivalent of a smokey bingo hall, hmmmm wait that reference doesn't fit anymore due to smoking laws, let's tray again. Let's just say that Europe now looks like some of my co-workers cars after a shift. I can honestly say that I don't know much about Iceland, the only thing I know for sure is that I used to hate that level in Super Mario 3, honestly how the hell can you jump off a slippery surface, still beat the game though, take that Bowser. I find it weird and fascinating that a place named Iceland has a volcano, would kinda be like if there was a place named Lava Land that had a skating rink, okay it's nothing like that, or a place in the distant future named WaterWorld that people actually wanted to see. Because of the huge ash clouds, many flights in Europe have been grounded for days, which would have been helpful to the people of Poland if it had to happen a couple of weeks ago, and has also caused Iceland to change it's national slogan to Iceland: If you don't like us you can kiss our ash.
In a story that shows how the world is going to hell in a hand-basket, police in Wilkinsburg Pennsylvania say that an eight year old boy distributed heroin to his third grade classmates. I remember being in third grade and being scolded for having junk food, how times have changed. Police said empty bags were found in the trash, but there was no evidence the drugs were used, although when asked about it the students responded by staring at the ceiling and saying that the officers skin was sooooo soft. Can you imagine the stones on the guy that is giving the heroin to the kid to pass out, I mean I know a lot of drug dealers try to hook kids early but why go for the Backyardigans demographic. When I was in third grade the only thing I overdosed on were fun dips, Mom and Dad thought it was cute until I started selling our appliances to get more, thankfully they found help for me and I am still fully recovered.......hmmmm how much can I get for my dvd player i wonder?
On the local front, Canada's version of the Grammy's, the Juno's, are about to start any minute here in St. John's. I haven't kept up on Canadian music very much in these past years but I assume Bryan Adams is still in the running for entertainer of the year, and that Glass Tiger is a shoe in for Group of the Year. The weather has not co-operated much this weekend as a lot of performers were stranded in Halifax by our own personal ash cloud, or as we call it...fog. Fortunately for organizers I believe every one made it, and festivities are going on as planned, for no matter what, nothing takes away a Newfoundlander's ability to party. I hear April Wine is getting inducted into the Hall of Fame, good for them, rumors that it was supposed be Rita McNeil's year but there just wasn't enough room for her are unsubstantiated. The big selling point of the Juno's at my work seems to be the arrival of young Justin Bieber, and it's kinda weird to hear them say how hot he is, the kid is like twelve, and yet I make one comment about Miley Cyrus and chloroform and I'm the creepy one, go figure. I can't make predictions cause I don't know who's up for anything but if I had to make one I guess that somebody buys alcohol and the show gets shut down cause Justin Bieber is a minor, causing his popularity to plummet like a Polish president.
Well that's some of the stuff I read this week, again the world is a crazy place, oh and Larry King got divorced again, who the hell keeps marrying this guy, or should I ask how the hell is this guy alive, he's like two hundred years old, I believe he's actually held together by those suspenders, and the weird thing is I bet he gets married again, I can't get a date at an all girls school and Larry freakin King gets married seven times, the world I growed up in is gone.
And that's news to me
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